Who is Sugar Motta anyway?
by fakeorganisms
Summary: Santiago Lopez and Brittany Pierce are in a happy, loving relationship but why is Brittany insisting that the new girl, Sugar Motta, start hanging out with them more? Santiago thinks she's really odd, but why could that be? Warning: Genderswap Santana. Will require a wild imagination, if you don't believe in time travel that is.


**AN: This is a litle something I've been writing with the encouragement of killercereal, the Sugar from the future queen! I hope you all like it. All feedback appreciated and welcome. I am still working on Soulmates and Feline Friends but this was too fun not to try.**

* * *

"Britt, I don't understand why we have to go to Breadstix with Sugar. This is _our_ date night," Santiago was grumbling his complaints as they made their way out to the car park after school.

It was Friday night.

Since they started dating officially last year every Friday night has been their date night. Actually, even before they officially started dating they still hung out every Friday night. Santiago spent most of that time creeping on Brittany like a repressed sex addict while she remained oblivious to the raging hormones emanating from her best friend in the whole world.

Eventually, much to Santiago's relief, Brittany's hormones began raging too so they decided to let them clash in a frenzy of out of control hormones and "friend sex" which basically meant that they were having hot, naked, sweaty sex in an attempt to "help each other out", as Brittany put it.

Yeah it may have taken a while for Santiago to be able to hold his load long enough for Brittany to start enjoying the sex as much as he was but that was a secret that both of them would take to their grave. Brittany thought it was really cute that Santiago got too excited and it made her feel pretty awesome that she had that effect on him. Santiago would make it up to her with his other body parts anyway so Brittany never complained. When Santiago was able to last longer than one song on her favorite Britney Spears album, sex became her second favorite thing to do ever. The first being cuddling and talking with Santiago because he always made her feel super special and he was so funny.

Despite the distraction of near constant and glorious sex, Santiago went and fell in love. They had made a promise that there were no feelings involved but that it was important that they both knew it was just practice until they got a boyfriend or girlfriend but Santiago broke his promise and that made him feel crappy because he never broke promises to Brittany. He didn't know, of course, that Brittany was in love with him too but she was afraid to admit it for the same reasons.

Kurt found it a little strange that neither of them seemed to understand that they _were _boyfriend and girlfriend but he never bothered to tell them. He figured that some people needed to figure things out on their own.

Brittany and Santiago hadn't had sex with anyone else, never kissed anyone else and hung out all the time. Every guy and girl in school was afraid to even accidentally flirt with Brittany because Santiago's wrath was more famous than Rachel Berry's short skirts. Santiago paid no attention to the array of girls that threw themselves at him. On one such occasion a daring Lacey Wong approached him at a party. She brought with her a bottle of beer and a flirty smile. Santiago asked if there was something wrong with her face while thanking her for the drink and asking her if she had seen Brittany. Lacey Wong cried. Santiago didn't notice because Brittany had come into view. Lacey Wong wasn't the first girl who tried to get his attention, and she certainly wouldn't be the last but none would ever be successful. Santiago's attention was too busy focusing on all things Brittany S. Pierce.

Of course when they finally told each other how they felt, their friends exhaled a long sigh of relief. Maybe now Santiago would stop being such an asshole? This was obviously wishful thinking. He continued being an asshole to everyone but Brittany and, strangely enough, Sugar Motta because Brittany very firmly told him to be nice to her. He also didn't immediately dislike Sugar, which was strange too. Sugar Motta was strange full stop and Santiago felt uneasy about her. Brittany seemed to feel the opposite though.

"Because, San, I invited her. Now stop being so anti-social and accept that she is our friend. Plus, Artie is coming too and I need you to tell him that he has to stay away from her, ok?" Brittany scolded him as she got into the car.

"What? Why? I thought you liked Artie. If I remember correctly, and I do, you even sang a duet with him in Glee. I still have nightmares about his attempt at crunking," Santiago turned the engine on and backed out of the parking spot, revving a little too hard from the memory of Artie Fucking Abrams singing to his girl.

"It was _one_ song and stop being so childish; Mr. Schue teamed us up and you weren't even in Glee yet. I made up for it that night when I let you-"

"Uh... I'm still here, you know?" Kurt interrupted from the backseat where his presence had been forgotten. As usual.

"Sorry Kurt," Brittany waved her hand in his general direction before continuing, "I just don't think Artie is the right guy for her. I need you to use your vicious words to keep him away."

"Ok." Santiago shrugged; secretly delighted that he could finally insult Artie without Brittany getting annoyed with him.

"Ok?" Brittany sounded surprised, which she had a right to be because usually it took a lot more reasoning, pouting, and kissing for Santiago to cave in.

"Sure. Someone needs to put him in his place and I think you're right about him being wrong for Sugar. She's too young anyway…. Uh… I don't know why I just said that," Santiago shook his head in confusion but for some unfathomable reason it felt like the right thing to say.

"It's ok, honey. You're right too. She's still a junior after all," Brittany leaned over to kiss his cheek in thanks.

"Yeah, exactly. She's a junior. Back when we were juniors we were-"

"Going at it like rabbits? Scarring me for life with your inability to keep your clothes on? Partaking in animalistic sexual acts in Rachel Berry's dads' bed? I still can't believe you did that," Kurt shuddered dramatically.

"We thought it was Rachel's bedroom. All that pink…"

"Shut up, Kurt."

"I hate you guys."

* * *

That evening Santiago and Brittany were cuddled up in their favorite booth at Breadstix. Santiago had just demolished three baskets of Breadstix breadsticks that were filled with carby and buttery deliciousness. Brittany was scolding him for not having any self-control.

"You never usually complain about that," Santiago winked at Artie, who averted his gaze elsewhere. Brittany giggled and agreed, kissing his neck and nuzzling her nose over his face until it met his own where they Eskimo kissed for a sufficiently awkward amount of time.

"I think I'm going to vomit," Sugar was covering her mouth and had turned deathly pale.

"Are you ok?" Artie asked in concern, his hand soothingly patting her upper leg as Sugar nodded only slightly.

"Keep your hands where I can see them, Abrams!" Santiago forcefully demanded.

"Um… ok."

"Sugar are you sure you're ok?" Brittany asked, moving out of Santiago's embrace and sitting up to watch her cautiously, pushing her full glass of water in the paling girl's direction.

"No. I mean yeah. I'm fine. I think the breadsticks are gone off or something."

"What? Britt, don't let her talk about the breadsticks like that."

"He's right Sugar, you can't just go around blaming the breadsticks. It's not their fault."

"Seriously guys, I'm fine. Let's just forget it."

Brittany curled back into Santiago who whispered in her ear, "Like I can just forget that she insulted my favorite food on earth."

"I know baby, but she didn't mean it."

Brittany didn't need to console Santiago for long though because the waiter arrived with their food.

"Are you not hungry?" Brittany asked Sugar who had yet to so much as pick up her fork.

"I think I need to be excused for a moment. I need to use the restroom." Sugar practically ran off but not before taking her phone from her purse.

"She must need to make an urgent call," Brittany surmised aloud as she picked at her meal.

Santiago, who had quite literally been shoveling the food into his mouth at an alarmingly fast pace, took the opportunity to give Artie a smack down. Verbally, that is.

"How's things, dude?" he asked, luring him into a false sense of security. Santiago liked to do that, it made the end result a lot more satisfying. Kinda like when Brittany told him to think of Finn's gassy face during sexy times to make it last longer. Sometimes it was just more fun to drag things out.

"Okay, I guess. You?" Artie was suspicious, Santiago could tell by his shifty eyes and sweaty brow. In that case he'd have to forgo the sense of security and go right for the jugular. Artie always was a total buzz killer.

"Same old. Anyway, enough chitchat, I need you to stay as far away from Sugar as physically possible. Am I clear?"

He could feel Brittany's hand squeezing his thigh in a silent warning to keep the threats to a minimum.

"No way, I really like her. Where is this coming from?"

"She's too young for you anyway. Your little girlish hands are not to touch her. Sugar shouldn't be dating until she's at least 21," Santiago immediately stopped talking. What was he saying? Sugar could date whenever she wanted. He looked at Brittany questioningly but she was smiling encouragingly back like he was acting entirely normal. Maybe Brittany was too blinded by his dazzling good looks and charm to realize when he did weird things.

"I just mean that she's out of your league. Fuck it, just back off or I'll arrange for a slushy facial to greet you every morning from now until I graduate," he said with finality.

"Brittany?" Artie asked her helplessly, wondering why she was letting Santiago speak to him so cruelly. Usually she would reign him in and keep him on a tight leash. It was no secret that Santiago was completely whipped.

"I agree with him Artie. I'm sorry but you're not right for Sugar. Trust me, you'll know what I mean in time," she answered cryptically.

"What does that mean?"

"Huh?"

Santiago and Artie asked but Brittany kept a blank expression as Sugar rejoined the table.

"What's going on?"

"Just chatting. So Sugar, are you enjoying your time in Glee?" Brittany expertly moved the conversation away from Artie, Sugar, and any references to the future.

Their food was eaten to the sound of Sugar speaking enthusiastically about Glee and all the numbers she had prepared for their coming lessons. Already Santiago was dreading them. Maybe he could convince Brittany to ditch them and they could make out in his car, that would be awesome. He spent the next twenty minutes zoned out and thinking of ways to get Brittany to agree to his plan.

When their plates were completely empty (thanks to Santiago's astounding appetite), they decided to get dessert.

Brittany ordered a chocolate Sundae with whipped cream as Sugar squealed excitedly.

"You seriously never change." She said much to everyone's confusion.

"You don't know her that long," Artie pointed out helpfully. Santiago was just about to say the same thing.

Sugar stared wide-eyed and open mouthed for a few seconds before Brittany spoke.

"That doesn't matter because we talk all the time. I told her I wanted to stop eating Sundaes because of my… uh…. my figure. I need to keep fit. For the Cheerios. She knows that I'm finding it hard to… like… change my habits."

Sugar nodded hesitantly but her expression barely changed, in fact, Santiago thought she looked even more freaked out. This is why he didn't want them crashing his date night. Brittany was being strange. Sugar was being strange. Artie was being Artie. The whole thing was starting to give him a headache especially because Brittany's excuse didn't even make sense but he'd be fucked if he let her think she couldn't eat what she wanted.

"Baby, you're perfect the way you are. You're so toned and fit. And really sexy. I'm sure if Artie wasn't too scared to admit it, he would say that the same thing. Am I right Abrams?"

"I can't answer that."

"Exactly. Brittany, you eat that chocolate Sundae and enjoy it. Sugar can keep her judgments to herself." He glared at Sugar for a moment until she looked ashamed of herself. Job done.

"Thanks sweetie," Brittany pecked his cheek causing him to blush lightly. Not that anyone would notice because of his dark skin.

Well, not that anyone would be brave enough to mention it because Artie damned well wouldn't. No matter how obvious the blush was.

"You guys are so adorable." Sugar spoke again, having recovered from her remark earlier. She was still eyeing Brittany suspiciously though.

"I'm not adorable," Santiago grumbled, he had a reputation after all.

"Of course not. You're my intimidating, strong man and you're not adorable at all. Especially when you smile really big and your dimples show. And when you want lots of post sex cuddles." Brittany giggled as Santiago huffed loudly and folded his arms.

"Ugh, you know what guys? I'm just going to go now." Sugar threw some dollars onto the table and stood up.

"I'll go with her." Artie volunteered.

"Remember what I said!" Santiago warned, directing a menacing stare right at him. Artie felt like Santiago was staring right into the depths of his soul. He gulped, "Of course. How could I forget?"

"You sure don't look too well Sugar. I hope it wasn't because of what I said about our sex life, I just feel so comfortable and open around my friends that sometimes I over-share." Brittany had that knowing look in her eye. The look she got whenever she was playing the "I know what you did but I'm waiting for you to tell me" game. Santiago had no idea what she knew but he was just glad that for once he had nothing to do with it.

"It's true. You'll get used to it." Artie agreed warily. He was all too aware of Brittany's over-shares. The whole Glee club was. Some even had the extra trauma of seeing the very events in real time. Like when poor Rachel caught them in her dads' room.

"Oh no, I should be used to it by now. I mean, nothing. Never mind. I'm going now. Come on Artie. Bye."

Before they could even return the goodbye, Sugar was gone.

"She is an odd one, Britt." Santiago said as he leaned back in the chair, relieved at having Brittany all to himself.

"You're right."

They sat in a contemplative silence for a mere few seconds before Brittany spoke again;

"San, do you think Sugar's hot?" she asked out of nowhere while Santiago was taking a gulp of his soda. He choked and started coughing loudly, what the fuck?

"No way. She's so… so…. Plain? Like she's good looking but in a sisterly way or something, " he answered once he caught his breath. Sugar reminded him too much of his cousin Nora for some reason.

"Hmmm… interesting," Brittany tapped her finger against her chin and nodded but before Santiago could question her, their dessert arrived and his stomach took control once more.

Brittany hurriedly typed something into her phone before tucking into her Sundae, moaning at the creamy goodness.

"See baby? Sundaes are great." Santiago kissed her cold lips and robbed a scoop of ice-cream.

"You're right. Maybe I won't bother cutting down at all," Brittany grinned, almost laughing at the outlandish idea of giving up chocolate Sundaes.

"What is this?" Santiago was holding up one of the dollar bills that Sugar had dropped onto the table, "I didn't know Obama was on a twenty dollar bill?"

Brittany smirked knowingly, "It must be a fake or something." She took the bill from Santiago's hand and stashed it away in her purse.

Oh Sugar, you're so busted.


End file.
